Well, it's almost three in the morning, and I'm inspired to write. I am amazed at who our God is.
We had some kids from the student ministry over tonight to watch a movie, and of course some stayed after, and don't the most beautiful conversations (or ugliest) happen after 1 am?
Years ago I laid in my bed crying and trying to figure out if it was worth it anymore. And now, I find myself beside these beautiful young people, crying on my couch, trying to figure it all out. How beautiful and poetic is this graceful God? To pull us out of such darkness, and not only save us from it, but USE us- CHOOSE us- as a hand to comfort, pray for, and guide hearts that are knowing that same -fear-loneliness-anger-confusion-hurt- we've known. I am so humbled. So struck.
Every time I hear their stories, I hear my own. I look over my shoulder and see all of those "Gilgals"...those moments where God brought the right person, the right sunrise, the right song, the right moment. And I see all the holes getting filled up with such a beautiful and divine love, that beautiful is not big enough of a word. How do we so easily lose this God? Make Him something less? I want to feel this every day. I want to wake up feeling the love that I'm loved with so strongly every morning.
Jacob's words after God speaks to him in a dream are running through my head tonight (Genesis 28:16-17): "When Jacob awoke from his sleep, he thought, "Surely the LORD is in this place, and I was not aware of it." He was afraid and said, "How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God; this is the gate of heaven."
1 comment:
I am so proud of what you are doing! You are making such an impact on those kid's lives. I pray for you both daily. God has great things in store for you.
I love you,
Mom
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